A thought prompted by youtiao

It is the Monday after International Women’s Day. I did not resist going back to work; I want to change and improve my work and study routines, and I arrived early because there is so much to do.

At 8:30 I began my “fasting experiment” with black coffee. I hope to lose some extra weight and look more energetic. For now, I have not set an end date.

I sometimes look forward to Monday because the markets open again. Their reactions to events fascinate me. I like to predict what might happen, then examine my thinking when I am wrong. Over time I feel I have learned to handle pressure and consider more angles.

Work took me to a distant place today, poorly connected but full of fresh air. When I finished, I stayed nearby at a Starbucks to review a course and write notes. Hunger came, but instead of grabbing anything, I knew exactly what I wanted for dinner: youtiao, fried dough sticks.

The shop I had in mind was two hours away. I packed up and went anyway. The story may sound small, but I like it: acting on something I truly want. It reminds me, in different ways, of the college entrance exam five years ago and of a love I pursued for years without success.

Earlier, while walking out of a building with a colleague, I had been wearing my usual expression. She smiled and asked why I looked so listless. I could not see it then. Hours later, catching my reflection, I realized she may have been describing the face I wear every day. I rarely spend attention adjusting it. That seems like a waste of my tokens when there is so much else to do.